


Fashion Advice

by randomcheeses



Series: What if? [17]
Category: Fullmetal Alchemist
Genre: F/M, Humour, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-09-26
Updated: 2010-09-26
Packaged: 2017-10-12 05:15:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 466
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/121186
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomcheeses/pseuds/randomcheeses
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Riza and Rebecca go shopping. Rebecca regrets this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Fashion Advice

"I don't know. . ." Riza said slowly, as she considered the garment that Rebecca was holding against her enthusiastically.

"Oh come on," said Rebecca, "It's perfect. You'll look great!"

Riza hmm'd, frowning.

"Well, what's wrong with it then?" her friend asked.

Riza hmm'd again, and Rebecca narrowed her eyes. "Are you changing your mind about the whole thing?"

"What? No," Riza said firmly. "It's just, well, look at it."

Rebecca looked at 'it'. Finding no fault, she looked back at Riza. "Yes, so. . ." she said, drawing the words out.

"It doesn't have any pockets."

Rebecca blinked. "Pockets," she said. "You're rejecting it based on a lack of pockets."

"Well, where am I supposed to put my gun? A holster won't fit anywhere around it, and I can't bring a handbag."

"You know, most women only carry cash and make-up in their-" Rebecca shook her head. "Never mind. Not the point. You won't be bringing your gun _or_ a handbag. Anything else you don't like about it?"

Riza regarded the garment in question with a sniper's critical eye. "It's far too tight around the legs. I wouldn't be able to run in it, and it's so attention-grabbing. What if someone attacked? I'd be a giant, slow-moving target. And I am bringing my gun," she added defiantly. "Someone has to watch the General's back."

"No one's going to be shooting at you," Rebecca snapped. "You are _not_ bringing your gun." She gave Riza a hard look and the blonde lieutenant caved a little.

"Alright," she admitted, "the truth is. . ."

"Yes?" Rebecca said impatiently. "What?"

"It's the whole thing," Riza said awkwardly. "It's too, too, poofy. I mean, look at it! Those shoulders. And that train. And those pink bits! I don't even know what they're for! I can't wear something like this."

Rebecca's mouth twitched into a smile, though her endeavour to conceal her long-suffering and aggravation was spoiled slightly by her gritted teeth. "Riza," she said in a worryingly polite voice, "it's not _poofy._ It billows _dramatically_ and _romantically_."

"Exactly. It's hardly practical."

Rebecca finally lost her cool. "It's not _supposed_ to be practical! It's not supposed to be designed for carrying a gun, or for running for your life, or covering Mustang's back while he does his snappy-fire thing. It's supposed to draw attention to you. It's your _wedding dress!"_

"Roy is getting married in uniform," Riza said blandly, ignoring Rebecca's red-faced outburst. "I should do the same. For equality," she added virtuously.

"What, you'll wear the dress if he does?"

"Maybe."

At this, Rebecca fixed her friend with a suspicious glare. "You've just been winding me up this whole time, haven't you?" she asked flatly.

"Yes," Riza admitted calmly. "But I was serious about hating the pink bits. And the poofy shoulders have got to go."


End file.
